bloom where you're planted

May 30, 2013 Teri-Ann Danielle

Once again, I am on a plane.

I was supposed to be driving home yesterday, but that didn’t work out like I had thought it would.

So I booked a flight for last night, but that also didn’t work out. A wonderful Alberta thunderstorm caused the plane to be diverted to Calgary, and then cancelled. I rebooked for this morning – a 7 am flight. It was nice to have one last evening at my parents’ house. My mom and I watched a girly movie and ate pizza. It was a good alternative to flying home.

I think it’s funny that I still see myself as shy and awkward. I am really not that shy. Awkward, yes, but apparently it doesn’t show that much.

Standing in line waiting to rebook a flight, the girl behind me started talking to me. I’ve basically convinced her to look into the same program I am in – Therapeutic Recreation at Douglas College. I even went so far as to give her my email address so I can get her the information she needs, and answer any questions she has.

Who even am I?? Giving strangers in the airport my email address!?

A shy person would not have gotten far enough into a conversation to even suggest a school or program, never mind give out an email address.

This is part of the reason why it is SO IMPORTANT to get out of our comfort zones. I know that if I spend all my time with the same people, in the same situations, it can be VERY hard to grow and change. Other people EXPECT us to be a certain way, the way we were when they met us. Those expectations, even if we don’t realize it, create an environment in which it is hard for us to change.

Leaving everything behind is VERY SCARY, but so very necessary, sometimes, to allow us to choose who we want to be. Starting fresh with new people, in a new place, allows us to start building ourselves (almost)from scratch. It’s pretty cool…

I am SO GLAD to be going back home to BC. The trip to Alberta didn’t seem long enough. I wasn’t able to see everyone that I wanted to. But I did get to hang out with my family a bit, and I did get to go to my brother’s graduation ceremony. AND I got to spend some quality time with Luna. I did not join her in swimming....

I know that part of the problem is that I don’t want to just schedule half an hour or an hour for each person. I want to be able to spend time with everyone, as much time as needed. This just means that more people should come to BC to visit me. I have room now!

I walked Whyte Avenue for the first time in probably over a year, with one of the very first friends I made in Edmonton. It was so weird to see how things have changed and what has stayed the same. I passed a couple of the places I used to live and work. We reminisced a bit about “the good old days” in the office and around the neighborhood. It was good to be reminded that there WERE good times on Whyte Avenue, even though a lot ended unhappily.

But it still doesn’t feel like I belong there anymore. I guess BC is where I belong for now.

I got a couple more tattoos during my visit. “Bloom where you’re planted”. That is my lesson. I am in BC right now, so I need to allow myself to get planted, to settle in (not just settle), invest in the people and community that surrounds me. And bloom.

And my best friend tattoo with Krista.

“A mess of gorgeous chaos”. Pretty much describes me, my life, my entire being.

I feel like a chaotic mess sometimes, but oh! When these moments come together, they create so much beauty in my life…

I wouldn’t trade my life with anyone.